Archive for the Typically French Category
Brittany Hillbilly
Well, it’s finally happened…
I’ve become a Brittany Hillbilly!
I think that I was born to be one….
I just took my time getting round to being one!
Next thing you know, you be seeing me reading with my eyes closed!
Whoops, you already have!
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All the best
He’s at it again!
A few weeks ago I posted some pictures of a nutter (no other word for it) who had parked his car on the road when there were plenty of perfectly good parking spaces in a half empty car park.
See Is it just me? for more details!
This morning I was getting some chicken netting for the new arrivals and I heard a put-put sound getting louder.
I had a strange feeling that I’d heard that sound before…
… my bottom started puckering and my heart began to race.
My testicles shrivelled to the size of peanuts; “I’d be changing my underpants tonight”, I thought to myself!
Chic or Cheeky?
Either the emergency services in rural Brittany have got very Chic recently or….
…. the owner of this Mini Cooper can’t read?
I spotted this in Redon yesterday.
I suppose it makes a change from VSP drivers parking wherever they like?
At least the owners of this illegally parked car had the sense to buy something that could do a little bit more than 45 kilometres per hour!
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All the best
Is it just me?
I mean, I’m just a normal guy (well, normal might not be the optimum word but…) who doesn’t go looking for trouble!
So, why is it that wherever I go, there is some nutter (and I’m being generous here) in a bl**dy VSP (Vehicle Sans Permis) parking like a blooming maniac – just to annoy me?
This guy had the choice of the car park to use…..
…so why did he park in the one place that was going to annoy other shoppers?
Conspiracy Theory
I’m beginning to think that there is a conspiracy theory at work here.
Perhaps somewhere in Brittany there is a VSP owners club and the members take it in turn to park their cars (if you can call them that) where I am likely to come across them.
For example…..
I spotted this one today!
As you can see, the owner of this car (the smallest car in the world) isn’t happy with using one parking space.
No, he (or she) needs to take up two!
Are they doing it on purpose?
Just to wind me up?
Perhaps (and this does make a lot of sense, to me at least), the driver was so blind that he (or she) couldn’t see the white line!
Now, that makes me feel really comfortable !
Do not water the plants!
Spotted this morning in Josselin!
Do not water the plants!
I love these signs!
I love the way they make my bladder tingle with anticipation!
So much so that I have to take a furtive look around to make sure no one is watching.
And then….
Somehow, I don’t think that any amount of signs will stop little boys from playing with their little toys!
It’s a very French thing…
To be able to have a pee outside!
Anyway….
The plants seem to be thriving?
All the best
I almost didn’t believe my eyes!
I almost didn’t believe my eyes this morning when I saw, for the first time ever, a properly parked VSP.
Normally VSP drivers are trained to take up three parking spaces.
This driver is obviously new to the whole VSP driving lark!
Note the way that he (or she) has left enough space for another VSP to park in the same parking space!
That’s not normal! That’s not French!
Perhaps that is a clue as to the owner of this VSP?
All the best
Typically French (again!!!)
Imagine my surprise when, after dropping the ThirteenYearOld at school this morning, I saw one of those beasts of the road – yes a mini peril of transportation – a VSP (see Typically French!) parked by the post office in La Gacilly.
I had to stop, didn’t I?
And I am very sorry for scaring the lady in the Renault Meganne who witnessed my emergency stop, I really am!
You see, not content with terrorising the roads, whichever evil demon designs these chariots from hell has come out with a four wheel drive version!
Typically French!
Spotted in Redon (there is a similar sign in La Gacilly as well – I wrote about it in August 2008.)
I’m not sure why is it so dangerous to have a widdle (as is every Frenchman’s right!) in the corner here.
Have they electrified the walls?
Ouch!
Double ouch!
It doesn’t bear thinking about!
All the best
Typically French!
In France, it is possible to drive a very small car without needing a driving license.
These cars are known as Vehicules Sans Permis (normally shortened to VSP), and typically have a 500cc diesel engine and enough space for the driver, a passenger, a folded newspaper and not much else.
They are, in my humble opinion, lethal!
To find out why I feel this way, take a look at a post I published back in August 2008.
Oysters in the garden.
Now, I know that it’s the middle of October and that we should be cuddled up in front of the fire but recently the weather has been nice enough for the Girlie and I to be able to spend some time outside and anyway, I don’t have a log fire to cuddle up in front of.
So, that’s how the Girlie and I found ourselves sat in the garden, the other lunchtime, eating a summer holiday meal of bread and cheese and oysters!)
I suppose that normal people would be thinking about winter stews around about now but then, I’m not sure that either the Girlie or I would classify ourselves as normal!
Typically French, again!
In France, it is a man’s in-alienable right to have a pee wherever he wants!
We do it in our gardens (to ward away the foxes.)
We do it in the street (just cos we can.)
In fact, we do it wherever we want to.
Some of us (and I have to include myself in this generalisation), even seem to take pride in peeing in public places – as though we were marking our spot!
Typically French!
In France, it is possible to drive a very small car without needing a driving license.
These cars are known as Vehicules Sans Permis (normally shortened to VSP), and typically have a 500cc diesel engine and enough space for the driver, a passenger, a folded newspaper and not much else.
They are, in my humble opinion, lethal!
It’s not that they only do 50km/hour – I personally have no problem with that – that tends to be my top speed, these days!
